3.4

Everyone is a Suspect, that’s the tagline of Murder on the Orient Express 2017 movie, it is a cinematic version of the book with the same name. Hercule Poirot is the best detective on the planet leaving on the Orient Express. The train inadvertently gets halted on account of a little snowslide. Much to his dismay that a murder was organized and that a man on the train was capable of carrying out such felony.

Murder on the Orient Express Trailer

Murder on the Orient Express Cast

Director:

Kenneth Branagh

Writers:

Michael Green, Agatha Christie

Stars:

Kenneth Branagh, Penélope Cruz, Willem Dafoe

There are a lot of other Hollywood Celebrities involved in this movie, you can check out the full list on IMDB

Murder on the Orient Express Watch Online Images

Murder on the Orient Express Full Review

What becomes very clear in the first five minutes of the film is how badly Kenneth Branagh has wanted to play Hercule Poirot, seemingly his whole life. It comes out of every pore of his being and yet, his unleashed and unchecked infatuation for the role only leads to a series of poor and mostly incredibly mindless choices.

murder on the orient express

One of the most talked about ones is clearly the mustache and it is a perfect symbol of Branagh’s completely unrestrained and cartoonish take on the story. It’s not unusual for the director, of course: restraint is not exactly the first adjective that comes to mind to describe his previous work, but here, it is simply so over the top that it becomes quickly unbearable.

Add to that that his French accent is horrendous when it doesn’t disappear almost completely (by the way, all artificial accents are awful in this movie, Judi Dench barely makes an effort to sound Eastern while Willem Dafoe doesn’t even try to sound Austrian), and that all the details he adds to the character are so completely British that it is astounding that no one in his entourage ever stepped and said, wait a minute: “why the hell does Hercule Poirot give a damn about egg size? Seriously?”

He carries around a ridiculous cane that then serves to choreograph an incredibly lame and unnecessary action sequence that, I suppose, was attempting to add some excitement in an otherwise incredibly flat and boring series of interrogation scenes, and other than that, he spends a lot of time yelling for no reason or making theatrical moralizing speeches that are completely ridiculous for anyone familiar with him:

Poirot’s new arc is to recognize that there may be a grey area in our moral code. You have read that right, this incredibly intelligent man who has been in this world for decades didn’t recognize until this particular point that the laws of men may be flawed and that everything can’t always be black or white. How remarkable!

Last but not least, Branagh was so focused on giving himself screen time that we barely see any of the rest of the cast, which, granted, may not be a bad thing sometimes (Penelope Cruz is stunningly awful), and sometimes quite disappointing (more Michelle Pfeiffer or Lucy Boynton, in particular, would have been welcome).

I would strongly recommend watching the Sydney Lumet version instead, there is a chance you will actually enjoy it.